My Thoughts on "Love"

My heart has finally begun to recover.  BUT THAT is not likely why you are reading.  SOME might be reading to see WHY SOMEONE who rarely says “I love you,” is DARING to speak about love.

 

Many know I’ve NEVER been in a romantic relationship.  MANY know I have very few friends.

 

So what do my views on “LOVE” MEAN AT ALL?

 

The honest truth is “nothing,” to most people.  I am VERY used to my thoughts meaning JUST THAT.  I keep my words and I KEEP my sanity, and that’s it.

 

I’m not expecting to start a revolution.  I’m not even going to TRY.  I AM, HOWEVER, going to EXPRESS MYSELF, because I am alive, I ACTUALLY DO FEEL LOVE, and I actually do try to share it in my daily life.

 

ENOUGH about my credentials.  When you look for me, I HOPE you’re not looking for a “positive statistic,” I hope you’re not looking for ONLY a “job,” “degree” or a “pedigree.”

 

I really did try to use a “title” to advertise myself and my capabilities.  Most of them just felt false very often.  Spirit says “I will eventually have to accept titles,” but as of now, I don’t really have one:  and I’m okay with that.

 

If anyone still wants to read…I WILL NOW TALK ABOUT LOVE...[shock] [awe] [crickets]

 

Many people START OFF with saying “love”.

 

That’s OKAY you can DO THAT.

 

PERSONALLY, I DON’T FEEL LIKE I KNOW YOU YET.

 

How many of these loving people who use the world “love” 100 times on a daily basis…ACTUALLY know each other?

 

OH, YOU MIGHT SAY THAT DOESN’T MATTER.  “We are all God’s Children” so NATURALLY WE LOVE EACH-OTHER.

 

All I’m SAYING is that it is a VERY HIGH BAR…THAT WE SET FOR OURSELVES.

 

Can all of us REALLY SAY, that we’ve never been COMPLETELY WRONG about “loving” someone?

 

I APPLAUD ANYONE…WHO STICKS WITH THEIR LOVE IN A HEALTHY WAY.

 

But personally, I like TO KNOW someone BEFORE using those words.

Because To me:  LOVE IS A COMMITMENT NOT A CASUAL GREETING.

 

With MY personality…if I were to “LOVE” EVERY SINGLE PERSON with the kind of devotion that those words mean to me:  I’d be BURNT OUT…IMMEDIATELY.

 

Yes, here come the criticisms, “love is beautiful, NOT PAINFUL.”

 

Here are MORE criticism “LOVE IS BOTH GIVE AND TAKE.”

 

We can go ON AND ON about how “beautiful” love is…AND I AGREE WITH YOU “IDEALLY.”

 

AS MUCH AS I’M CALLED DELUSIONAL AND A “SPACE CADET”

 

I ACTUALLY DO TRY VERY HARD TO LIVE IN OUR REALITY.

 

This is NOT something I’m going to try to PROVE, so believe it, doubt it or don’t believe it.

 

·         IN MY REALITY LOVE TAKES A LOT OF EFFORT.

 

·         UNDERSTANDING TAKES A LOT OF EFFORT.

 

·         LEARNING AND GROWING TOGETHER TAKES A LOT OF EFFORT

 

-OH “Dan, YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO ADD that last bit!  WE ARE PERFECT AS WE ARE.”

 

AH…YOU’RE RIGHT!  ANOTHER BIG MISUNDERSTANDING

 

BETWEEN MYSELF AND MANY PEOPLE THAT I TRY TO LOVE.

 

So many people think “love” gives us permission to stay the same…almost forever.

 

I LOVE MY MOM TO DEATH…but she hasn’t changed much.

 

I AM SO HAPPY THAT MY PARENTS LOVE EACH OTHER.

 

I AM BY NO MEANS “KNOCKING” a love that is based closer to stasis than growth.

 

However, AS YOU CAN IMAGINE my love is similar but different.

 

I think EVERYONE is perfect as they are BUT I BELIEVE WE’RE ALL HERE TO LEARN.

 

So…It’s a little backwards…in my opinion.

 

It’s hard to GIVE APPROVAL for staying the same for decades.

 

HOWEVER, NO ONE NEEDS MY APPROVAL.

 

And THERE ARE MANY WHO I LOVE…who haven’t “changed” much.

 

SO THEN…WHAT IS MY POINT?

 

MY ONLY POINT:  is that I like to get an idea of what I’m IN FOR.

 

Some Questions/worries that go through my mind:

 

“Is this person going to continually make the same mistakes?”

 

“On top of that…if they prefer “stasis” OR “unconditional love” I CANNOT ADVISE.

 

“IS THIS PERSON GOING TO GIVE BACK?”

 

===HOLD ON----STOP THE PRESSES---YOU ADMITTED YOU’RE SELFISH!?

 

Can’t get anything past you: yes, I did.

 

AS I MENTIONED…I can’t LOVE EVERYONE I MEET

 

WITH THE SAME AUTHENTICITY AS THE “I LOVE YOU’S”

 

===NEWS FLASH…There MIGHT be people who get “I love you’s” from me…

 

THAT REGRET IT QUITE OFTEN.

 

--People don’t always realize…I’m 100x harder on myself than anyone.  I’m under no delusion that I’m an amazing person worthy of praise.

 

If I HAPPEN to get that praise, I’VE WORKED HARD TO ACCEPT IT.

 

Some of us who are so used to being shut down by ourselves an others, it’s hard to do.

 

So yes…If I EVER get praise for something I’m good at…and someone’s mad:

 

as my Dad likes to say, “They can go pound sand.”

 

-BUT GETTING BACK TO MY WORRIES/QUESTIONS:

 

You might wonder if I’m “heartless.”  Why can’t I let people make the same “mistakes” if they aren’t harming anyone?  WELL…lots of people see me as “judgmental” but THAT is a judgment as well.  The thing about MANY types of “unconditional love” is THEY OFTEN DON’T KNOW HOW to deal WITH THEIR ACTUAL IMPACT ON OTHERS.

WE CAN GET VERY CAUGHT UP IN “LOVING” OUR SELF IMAGE…

 

THAT WE CANNOT IMAGINE THIS “IMAGE” COULD HURT SOMEONE.

 

This is just food for thought, BUT TAKE THIS AS FOOD TOO.

 

Most of the unawakened people don’t see themselves as the problem.

They have an idea for the “solution” and an idea for the “problem.”

 

Most of the awakened and “highly spiritual” people seem to speak similar.

 

My choice:  I don’t care what our skill levels or circumstances.  I don’t care HOW MUCH we’ve suffered on this EARTH.  I SYMPATHIZE with all suffering, I really do.  I’m NO STRANGER to pain.

 

In fact…I feel like crap right now.  Oh…many have told me that it’s MY FAULT.  My pain is because I have not let go and dealt with all my inner turmoil.

 

My internal response:  Oh, THANKS SO MUCH, you are so smart.  I agree with EVERYTHING YOU SAID…BUT IF WE ARE ALL MIRRORS….

 

WOULDN’T THAT MEAN IF YOU ARE MISERABLE…

 

YOU ARE ALSO THE CAUSE?  [GHASP]

 

We’re all playing “the blame game” and don’t realize it.  ALL OUR SUFFERING IS SOMEONE ELSE’S FAULT.

 

Yes…many people have hurt us.  But each painful lesson WAS MEANT to teach us something…if my “highly spiritual friends,” can be believed.

 

=AGAIN AND AGAIN…I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE THEM.

But sometimes WE ALL NEED OUR OWN WISDOM…put in front of us.

 

And that wisdom I have “collected,” and most likely “butchered” is this:

 

NO MATTER WHAT DIMENSION WE’RE STILL HUMAN.

AND HUMANS MAKE MISTAKES AND LEARN FROM THEM.

IT WOULD BE TRULY GREAT IF ALL OF US

TOOK ACCOUNTABILITY FOR THE “PROBLEMS.”

 

NO NEED to take FULL ACCOUNTABILITY.  But REALLY THINKG about HOW WE STILL CONTRIBUTE TO THE WORLD’S PROBLEMS.

 

I will say it proudly, before I take a NAP: I am a part of the problem.

And…I’m sorry…no matter how AMAZING you are…you are part of it too.

IT’S HARD TO BE THE SOLUTION…

WHEN WE DON’T RECOGNIZE OUR PART

IN THE PROBLEM.

 

SO THE LAST AND FINAL THING…

 

I HAD WONDERED… “Is this person going to give back?”

 

And I had JOKINGLY criticized this as “selfish.”

 

With my idea of love…and I think MANY with good hearts can relate…NOT ALL…BUT SOME.

 

I have been in MANY relationships where I felt like I was DOING EVERYTHING to HELP THEM.  AND THEY THOUGHT GRACING ME WITH THEIR PRESENSE OCCASIONALLY WAS ENOUGH.

So…just like “I had a right to be stupid” and let this unbalanced friendship continue

 

I’m sure I’ve hurt somebody like that too…I can think of a few people who I was never interested in that really liked me…Well…NOT MUCH LATELY…I mean…if someone LIKES this “crazy awful” person…then yes…they know what they’re getting into LOL.

 

But anyways…

 

We’ve actually got to the end.

 

You may not believe…and YES…I’m tired of saying that…but when it’s NO LONGER TRUE MOST OF THE TIME…I will gladly stop saying it.

 

I have had MANY people doubt what I’m about to say.

 

Which is: I WRITE FOR MANY REASONS, BUT THESE ARE TWO:

 

I WRITE BECAUSE I NEED TO, AM COMPELLED TO

 

I WRITE BECAUSE MY GUIDES WON’T LET ME SLEEP UNTIL I DO.

 

So…yeah…I get disappointed…when all my writing does lately is “piss people off.”  I REALLY DO.  I have been TRYING so hard…NOT TO TRY AND HELP.

 

Because my help is poison to so many people.  I am NOT worthy of giving advice.

 

So yes.  The current world wants to embrace it’s “perfection,”

 

AND DAN CUZZO IS LAUGHING ABOUT IT.

 

BUT THAT’S OKAY…you all do your “light and love,”

 

THE WHOLE WORLD NEEDS IT.  THEY ARE BEGGING FOR IT.

 

I’M GOING TO READ A BOOK.

 

AND THEN ANOTHER.

 

AND THEN ANOTHER.

 

AND…YOU GET THE PICTURE.

 

When someone truly “wants me” for something…

 

--YOU CAN LET ME KNOW—

 

BECAUSE I’M SURE YOU CAN FIT INTO MY EMPTY SCHEDULE.

 

====You know, I have at least a dozen people I can say “I love you” to.

 

That’s ACTUALLY what gave me the MOTIVATION to write.

 

I was so HAPPY.  That’s more than I ever had before.

 

Some of them don’t know I actually care about them, but that’s life for now.

 

I’m not someone who says “I love you” to make everything better.

 

LOL…there are times when I can do that…but THE VERY FIRST TIME…IS NOT ONE OF THEM.

 

Clarify:  I will not win someone’s friendship with “I love you.”

 

I will not win a “date” or a relationship by saying “I love you.”

 

As I mentioned…in my poem “Rock Collection.” (on HelloPoetry)

 

I like to say I love you when I see “all of you.”

 

So yes…the “good times” are fine…

 

but even if you’re really mad…even if it’s at me…that’s OKAY.

 

So long as I see a bit more of who you are…I’m not someone who WANTS you to feel pain…because I WANT those I love to be HAPPY…

 

But the thing is…I’M NOT SURE HOW HAPPY WE CAN BE

                                    WHEN WE’RE HIDING SOME OF WHO WE ARE.

 

Please prove me wrong…send me wonderful examples of successful couples who NEVER FIGHT…or MAKE UP REALLY FAST…who are constantly, consistently similar.

 

We…basically are back to my parents….so YEAH…IT CAN HAPPEN.

 

IT’S NOT WHAT I WANT…BUT IT IS “LOVE” FOR MANY PEOPLE.

 

All I’m explaining…is “my thoughts on love,” BECAUSE I NOTICE

 

MOST PEOPLE SEE “LOVE” DIFFERENTLY.

 

In fact…I think some of the things I said…are “blasphemous” to many.

 

This is my point of view…I don’t plan to come back if I’m not compelled or asked.

 

And I don’t expect to be asked…so that really just leaves “compelled.”

 

I was going to apologize…but I really am done “apologizing” “cautioning” putting “disclaimers” on what I see as my truth.

 

My average “views” on a piece of writing…RARELY goes over 10 viewers.

 

These are “The Pro’s and Cons” of being obscure.

 

The Pro:  I CAN SAY WHAT I WANT WITHIN REASON.

 

The Con:  FEW WANT TO LISTEN.

 

-I ACCEPT this tradeoff at ALMOST EVERY OPPORTUNITY.

 

So…the world is a mess…everyone for one reason or another

decides that they need to be perfect or faultless

or just keep quite about all the elephants in EVERY room

THOUGH MANY COMPLAIN for so long…

 

“This one is so awful”

 

“The country has betrayed us all”

 

“This one is a criminal”

 

-ALL THE PEOPLE 3D trusted are falling down…but please don’t think our “saviors” are perfect.  [OUCH]  “Dan, THAT WAS UNNECESSARY…you FINALLY ENDED IT NICELY…BUT YOU HAD TO “SHIT TALK” AGAIN.

 

Yes…unlucky as you are…I GOT a second wind.

 

HERE IS A MIND-BENDER

YOU CAN SEE PERFECTION

BUT PERFECTION IS STILL

PERFECTING ITSELF.

 

WE TALK ABOUT ASCENSION LIKE IT’S A “ONE OFF” DEAL.

 

Ascension is a process that existed ALWAYS.

 

We learn, we grow…I imagine that when we PASS A THRESHOLD..

 

SOMETHING AMAZING MIGHT HAPPEN.

 

But they tell us over and over again…it’s not about those magical moments of enlightenment.  Learning and Growth is something, ideally, we all should be taking in stride.

 

We all choose our “acceptable speed” and we choose which “terrains to avoid.” But many of us park ourselves somewhere and never leave.

 

5 years…10 years…LOVELY place…20 years…30 years….UM… “LOVELY?”

 

I APPLAUD ANYONE WHO CAN STAY IN THE SAME PLACE for very long

AND CONTINUE TO LIVE HAPPY HEALTHY LIVES.

 

But I believe…you are only HALF the pool.

 

Many of us keep doing the same things and expecting different results…and THAT can get tricky.

 

It would be wonderful if someone accepted me JUST as I am…

BUT HONESTLY…I still have A LOT of work to do.

 

If I REALLY DO HAVE SOMEONE

BRAVE ENOUGH TO TRULY LOVE ME.

 

Then…I’m going to be me…but in the best way I can.

 

I AM a work in progress:

NO ASCENSION is going to fix every one of my problems.

YES…I HOPE WE ARE “SAVED”

But for the love of vegetables

LET’S ALL SAVE OURSELVES

AS MUCH AS WE CAN.

 

In my book…that’s looking at who we are.

Not the image that we want to be.

 

To me…LOVE is only possible with some level of SINCERITY.